How People Reinforce their Own Fears.

So many people start there sentences with, “It’s hard”. My response is often a kind of sigh/hands on face gesture.

The thing is, I often catching myself saying this. And I really have to just give myself little slap and say, ‘Stop being a little whiny wet flannel’.

Mate… Life is hard. Things are hard. If they weren’t everyone would be doing them.

The key to overcoming adversity and breaking through the ‘it’s hard’ barrier is to take the challenge, stand up, and flipping do it.

The mantras of ‘it’s hard’, and ‘I don’t know’; mental self chatter to this degree reinforce and affirm your fears. They take you further away from your goal.

Support yourself! Why wouldn’t someone turn his own self chatter into a supportive mechanism?! …Because you can! It’s just a matter of conditioning you to empower yourself. Check out my post on incantations if you want to take your fear and turn it into a strength.

As a man that I admired once told me, when I was mucking about and procrastinating out of fear:

“Why not? you’ve got nothing to lose mate…”


-Ben

If you liked this post, check out this post as well. Peace.

The Depth of Your Primary Focus is Equal to Your Depth of Presence.

Some people just seem to be good at everything. They just put their hand to something, and they just, seemingly by osmosis, excel and assimilate their way into the higher echelons of their chosen field. They seem to give off a certain aura.

Other people are the opposite. Whatever they do, it’s not quite the same. They can never quite reach that level of detail, that level of skill, that level of charisma that the other guy does without even trying.

The truth is, you can tell where people’s minds are just by looking at them. The depth of a persons presence is equal to the depth of his primary focus.


To tell whether somebody has great depths to them, whether they have their eye on a purpose larger than themselves, only takes a glance. You can tell whether they are shakeable, or whether they are unflappable in their commitment and dedication to their task. You can tell whether it would take merely a few words to distract or break the person. For someone that has great depths to them radiates the energy of a higher purpose, they radiate trustability and focus.

Most people fall into the second category. They struggle just to ‘do’ things in the same way that the naturals do.. They do not breeze through the days all the while exuding charisma. Their eyes are not on the prize. They are too easy to shake off of their path. They do not exude the confidence of a man/woman that knows where he stands. Their eyes are on the next activity, the next fix.

Most men spend their day thinking about sex. Obviously there is nothing wrong with this, however consider: The steady gaze of a man who has spent all day focusing is life around sex, versus a man who has spent his day focusing on organising his life around the fulfilment of his highest purpose…

For the man who has his eyes on his highest purpose all of these other things in life are trivialities. Trivialities that yes, he can still enjoy, but they do not amount to much meaning for him. They are little side games. And so his body dances with his mind, and he easily converses with women, and he easily dribbles the ball into the goal. And if he doesn’t he isn’t really flapped, he just picks himself up and carries on, it’s just a game.

If you want to be a person of integrity. Someone that exudes depth and the wisdom of knowing your own death. Then you must right NOW find your deepest purpose, for THIS MOMENT. It doesn’t start later, tomorrow, whatever, you’ve got excuses, you could be in a wheel chair; if you have a now, you have a purpose in that now: this is what you are looking for.

The now is in constant flux, and you purpose changes with it. In order to exude presence and integrity, one has to go deeper. One has to go beyond the layers of superficiality of social status and opinion, and go inward into that which makes him tick; his purpose. If he can find this, if he can create a vision for himself based on his purpose, and if he can train himself to constantly be giving his fullest give in THAT MOMENT, then he will be unshakeable, because superficialities will be unable to rock him off of his path, it is deeper than can be touched and shaken, and his integrity will not allow it to be, because he is fixed in time with his presence, and like time itself, it cannot be touched, whatever you may do the objects of time.


So… Right now. Ask yourself… What is your purpose? Are you fearful?

If you were to die now, would you die in the fullest giving of your gift, or would you die with yet things that you would have done if you had known? Would you die for your purpose?

“The biggest tragedy is not that we aim high and don’t achieve it, it’s if we aim low and do.” -David Deida


-Ben

If you liked this post, then I’d recommend checking out this post also.

Why YOU Should Meditate.

Walking down the road today from the train station to a cafe down the road. I counted about 40-50 thoughts roughly. That was a 10 minute journey.

The majority of people have the same problem. To focus on one thing is almost impossible, because their processing power is all over the place, they are trying to download 50 files at once on 4G.

In fact most people think even more than this! It’s a scientific fact that humans can only think consciously about one thing at a time. Try it: Think about an image of empire state building and the shape of England at the same time….

A quick google search shows that: “…When we have between 50,000-70,000 thoughts per day, this means between 35 and 48 thoughts per minute per person.”

Well NO WONDER we can’t get anything done!

When’s the last time you just sat in silence for 10 minutes and watched your thoughts?

My Martial Arts teacher likened the flow of thoughts to a train station. The station is the mind, the train is the thought, and the little person standing on the platform is the awareness. Most people’s stations are flipping Waterloo at rush-hour.

Meditation is the practice of observing the trains come and go as they will, completely out of your control. They they come and go, come and go, come and go, until eventually the flow of trains begins to slow down. Instead of a constant flow of trains rushing by urgently, there seems to be silence in between the passings by, and there is simply emptiness until another slowly potters through. Able to fully feel the breeze on your face and the smell of fresh leaves on the wind, this train comes past, and you watch it… then it passes, and again all is quiet.

Most people know that meditation is good for them. However thoughts are terrified at the idea of not being in control. Thoughts will come and say “To sit in silence?! A waste of time! Stupid!” And so we are enslaved by our thoughts, the master becomes mastered by his tools.

The big barrier that stops people from actually practicing is the trust in the silence…

In order for more people to cultivate trust in the consistent practice meditation, it would be helpful to understand the place from which all of our thoughts come. Because you don’t chose your thoughts… your thought come to you. Where from?

The stillness. This stillness is a gift to you. From stillness one can see clearly, and from from emptiness one can discern.

Meditation is about cultivating your stillness. It is about nourishing your awareness through the practice of prolonged attention to your stillness. By cultivating your awareness in the stillness, you are more able to see clearly that which is not still, increasing your presence, and fundamentally increasing your sensitivity and thus your vitality.

When one meditates, it is not that nothing is going on, it is that SO much is going on, in the doing of nothing. Doing in no-doing, by no-doing; Doing the no-doing.

One must give the silence it’s due, listen to it’s voice, if one is to reap the gifts of discernment. To listen to both yin and yang, the whole world becomes larger.

Turn the blur into a piece of artwork, and see and touch every little piece of it as you runs your awareness over it.

Good place to start in regards to meditation:

  1. Sit quietly, ideally somewhere quite (it doesn’t matter, but does allow for further unguardedness) and where you will not be disturbed.

2. As you allow the breath to pass through you – no pulling in of air but simply allowing it to fill and empty itself through you – pay attention to your nose. Simply place your awareness on it and watch it.

3. Your attention will likely stray to thoughts, and that is fine, no matter, just again place your attention on your nose. That was a repetition.

4. Continue to bring your attention into focus from the straying into thoughts and distractions. When you feel proficient at focusing on your nose, now you may bring your awareness to rest on your entire face. Not trying to control anything, simply resting your awareness on it, relaxing, and allowing whatever comes to come and go. Watch thoughts and feelings as they come and go. If a particularly potent one comes along that feels urgent, simply take a mental note for later and continue the practice, watch it pass.

5. Again, when you feel proficient, bring your awareness to rest on a larger entity, your entire body. Again, noticing thoughts and feelings as they come and go, bringing your awareness back when it strays, being relaxed and impartial… simply watching.

Now those are the principles.

These principles can be applied as you will. You can do this while walking, or washing dishes, anything, just remember it is about relaxation, impartial watching, and cultivating awareness through guiding your focus back to stillness.

When you feel confident at meditating in this way, try bringing your awareness back into itself. Who is watching the thoughts and feelings? Watch the watcher. See what you find.

“We cling to our own point of view, as though everything depended on it. Yet our opinions have no permanence; like autumn and winter, they gradually pass away.” -Chuang Tzu


-Ben

If you liked this post, then here is another post that you might like.

How Music Can Bring People UP

Always I’ve had a back and forth between my artistic development, and my own development. Always it seemed to be a choice… Music or Self…

This is a false dichotomy. It’s taken me so many years to realise that one can be an artist and also allow his own self-development to be his first and foremost priority.

Music is culture. 

Culture is all about bringing other people up. I don’t care what anyone else says. Whether it is intentional or misled, cultures are created as a way of sharing and empowering one another. Music is no exception.

The cliches and stereotypes regarding the ‘popular’ music industry has tainted it’s image to it’s very core. I’d been misled in regards to what it’s all about, even though both of my parents flipping work in the wider music industry.

For instance: Due to bad experiences with prescription drugs in my teens, I tend to try and avoid all drugs, even mere Ibuprofen. There have been many times when I have considered not entering the music industry and pursuing that career path purely because I was led to believe that all musicians are into drugs, and that they took part in a culture of self-destruction. I didn’t want to be part of that.

This was pure ignorance on my behalf, and even though this is not uncommon, this is FAR from the case for the majority, and I can only take responsibility for my former views, regardless of how much of this belief was actually perpetuated by myself.

now look back at those times and feel that I should have known that the feelings that I got when I listened to music; the inspiration, the feeling of empowerment and excitement the feeling of possiblity; That in and of itself was what it was what it was all about. I wanted to give people the feeling that I felt when I listened to my favourite artists. I wanted to touch people in the way that music has touched me, to my very core.

The arts are CULTS. Cults are vehicles for education and empowerment… If wielded correctly.

Now: Here’s a potent point by my main man Abraham Lincoln:

“Nearly all men can stand the test of adversity, but if you really want to test a man’s character, give him power.”

Music at it’s core is about bringing other people up. And this is what musicians do. They pour their heart out in order that others are not alone. They share their deepest darkest secrets, as does any artist, giving you their hearts on a plate for you to share and stand with, or to move on without.

It’s not about what you do, it’s about who you are. And what you do is an expression of those gifts; How do you give your gifts?

Here’s another I found while searching for the former. I couldn’t leave it out:

“To ease another’s heartache is to forget one’s own.” -Abraham Lincoln


-Ben

If you liked this post, then check out this post also! 

Anxiety

The rest is for the better
It’s said ‘sleep is for the weak’
Suppose that trying makes one tired
And makes one need his sleep
Suppose that giving in,
Letting go of ones control,
Could make one see the reason for it
And give him save from woe

Until ones tired of this way
Suffering one just gives in
And only then does it begin
Observation
For no win

I’d pay the extra currency just to access retrospect
To see it through, to separate, and know it in my bones
Except
The darkest moment seems so real
Tearing consciousness from me
Telling me of what I know
Disdaining the unknown
Till I was over thrown
Not shown
That impulse
Taken up in fear
Can be worse than a hundred tears

It made me lose my way
One may be right to say
That is ‘Maybe it’s just a different way’
But heartfelt degradation
Despite of hesitation
Made me know that I had torn myself
From realisation
For visualisation
When desire replaced
My destiny

So I watched and payed a price
A sum I won’t pay twice
Or maybe that I will
At least I know it comes of will,
The shining serpent of my mind
That convinces one to kill
Yet
No need that I have found
No sensation or thill
Has ever taught me love of life
To follow feeling
Not the bill.
For mistakes have taught me well
Virtue, Sin, and Self
Have now to access
Heaven and Hell
Just a shadow on a shining surface
Separate from self.

I try not to talk it knowingly
As if I knew a thing
For truth is that I don’t
And it’s not me that writes these things

 


-Ben

If you liked this post, then I’d recommend checking out this post also.

Photographer: Kat Jayne